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Are we too young to get together?

Hi! I’m a girl of 15 and there’s something I’ve been wondering about for quite a while. I’m a Christian. There’s a boy who I’ve really got on well with for the past year and we trust each other totally. My mum and dad have always said that I am too young to have a boyfriend, but I don’t agree. I think that as long as we keep to the limits the Bible has set, that we’re ok. If we had hurried things then I would understand my parents, but we have let the relationship develop very slowly the whole time. Everyone thought we would get together ages ago, but neither of us wanted to in case we got hurt. He means so much to me, and we usually hold hands, cuddle and just be with each other. But we haven’t yet kissed. That’s why I don’t know why mum and dad are like that. I talk openly with them about these things.

Hi girl of 15,

I think it sounds like you have let your relationship develop in a good way. It’s a really good idea to spend time getting to know each other before you get together as boyfriend and girlfriend. When your mum and dad say that you’re too young to have a boyfriend, then they are probably thinking that the reason for having a boyfriend is in order to have a stable relationship and then get married. The fact that you are 15 now means that you still have a lot of time. They don’t want to spoil things for you, but they are trying to protect you from being disappointed and hurt.

When you are 15 and have got a boyfriend it can easily feel like you have found the right one, but a lot of teenage relationships do break up. People change and develop a lot in their teenage years, and a boyfriend you have in your teenage years might not be the person you will enjoy being with so much as an adult. There are, however, some people who meet each other while teenagers, and who get married and stay together their whole lives, so I can’t give you one right answer. It sounds like you and this boy are good friends, and can talk openly, so you already have a good friendship, and you have each other even though you haven’t started a romantic relationship. A good friendship is the very best start and an important foundation in a relationship.

It’s good to hear that you talk openly with your parents about these things, and I think you will all be able to agree on what is best for you.

You might also like: Finding a sweetheart og How can I find the right partner?

Best wishes,

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