Hi!
Thanks for writing to us. We have answered questions like this before, and we’re including some links that you should read. We encourage everyone who is plagued by thoughts of taking their own life to contact an adult who can talk with them about this.
It is really painful to have thoughts like this, and it is important that you don’t keep them to yourself. We would usually encourage young people who struggle with suicidal thoughts to talk to their parents, but we don’t know how old you are, nor do we know if your family situation is such that you can talk to your parents about the difficult thoughts you have.
There are several adults who can help, for example:
A school nurse
A teacher at school or your doctor or emergency doctor
A priest, pastor or youth leader
There are also helplines on the internet where you can talk to someone on the phone at any time of the day or night, you can also chat with them if you find it easier to write.
It is very difficult to have thoughts of suicide. Well over half of the population of Norway have felt at some point in their lives that ‘I can’t handle life any more’, or ‘I want to die’. Sometimes life seems so tough that people don’t think they can make it, and at this point they can start to think of suicide. But it is often the idea that they can’t keep going as life is right at that point. They think that suicide is a solution to what they feel is hopelessness. Thoughts of suicide, or thoughts of not being able to go on with life, can come when people are in a difficult situation. However, they disappear when the situation gets better or when the painful feelings lessen. For some people these thoughts don’t stop, and the person then thinks ‘there is no good solution for me’.
We are not that good at solving problems when we are hurting inside (psychologically). It’s hard to think of opportunities and solutions when you are in an intensely emotional situation, or when life feels empty and meaningless. Most people need a change in their lives, a way out, and most people don’t actually want to die. People who struggle with thoughts of suicide usually do want to live, if they see the opportunity they have.
Attempts at suicide are a bad solution, and those who survive are usually very glad that they survived. Even though you might not see a way out at this very moment, things will get better over time. Emotions disappear, and when they get better you will be glad to be alive. There is always hope! You can get good help by talking to someone you trust.
It isn’t that easy to answer your question about coming to heaven as we don’t know what really lies behind it. There are lots of reasons why people get into a situation where it seems so dark that they think that life isn’t worth living any more. It may be due to serious physical or mental illness, or a combination of these. It can also be due to shameful and serious sin which is hard to live with. God, through His Word, tells us that no situation in our lives is so hopeless that He can’t reach into it with His light. The psalmist David says in Psalm 23 that the Lord is his Shepherd, and even though he were to walk through the valley of the shadow of death, God is there too.
Jesus has paid the price for every sin and all shame that people carry. He was judged for our mistakes and our offences. By turning to Him and asking for forgiveness, we will be totally forgiven. Jesus was punished for everything we have done wrong, and we can go free. And that forgiveness is complete, it is a gift from God to us. But our forgiveness cost God a terrible price, that He sacrificed His own Son in our place. When we receive this gift from God in faith, we are clothed in the perfect righteousness of Christ, and thus we are made righteous and able to enter heaven and be with God for eternity. That is good news! Even if someone dies an abrupt and unexpected death, they are clothed in the righteousness of Christ if they die in the faith. As you wrote in your question, Paul writes in Romans 8:38–39 that he is certain that nothing can separate us from the love of God in Jesus Christ, neither death nor life. If we continue in faith in Jesus and live our lives in the light, God is faithful and righteous and forgives us all our sin. So it is not possible to conclude that someone will be lost and not go to heaven even if they commit suicide while they are in a difficult personal crisis. But as I have said, this question is also about which circumstances and faith a person finds themselves in when they take their life.
It is important that those who know people who are in a crisis, where suicide is a possibility, see their opportunity to help in the best way possible, by sharing the truth of Christ, bringing light and hope as they think about the future. That is a demanding but meaningful task for every believer. Jesus is our hope, and He has a great future for us.
Paul says in Philippians 1:23 that he desired to depart from this life and be with Christ. He longed to be with Jesus, but he said that he would rather stay on this earth out of care for the people around him, to bring them joy, to see them develop in their walk with Christ, and to complete the tasks that were prepared for him to do. He wanted to take as many people with him to heaven before he died and went to be with God for eternity. We live a life of faith to help others and encourage each other to reach the goal. God has given us these days on earth, and He says in His Word that He has a purpose for us, both now and in eternity.
You ask which branch of Christianity we at boyandgirl.info come from. We are from a variety of evangelical Christian backgrounds in Norway, some of them are Lutheran. This means that we have a common faith in the good news that Jesus is the Son of God, that He paid the price for our sins on the cross, and that He rose from the dead, went to heaven, and has sent the Holy Spirit to lead the church today. We believe that He has given us the Bible which is God’s Word, revealed to people and written down in the Bible.
Suicidal thoughts
Best wishes, boyandgirl.info